“No Fun”

2012/08/24

it was fun being part of
the local punk scene
when I sniffed glue with others
playing bass
copying Ramones
idolizing Vicious

it was fun being part of
the folk scene
where punk background
provided interesting solutions
to whatever was the tradition

it was fun being part of the
small press scene
where cliché words and beats
were hot, and the words I copied
from folk songs
made money
but not for me, clearly

it was fun being a poet, songwriter,
musician, in front of categorizing
eyes, it was fun pretending
well-read, when all I ever used
as sources were either “Finnegans Wake”
or “Junky”

it was fun being hooked on Swans
and other mock gods
while all they ever did was
phlegming along the shit trail
thinking inner demons matter
I thought that too – but then I encountered
real ones

and now, after some short time on the side road
of being post-this, post-that, this –ism, that –ism
understanding more but encompassing less
I rarely care or argue anymore
I find myself in the same spot
poor and uneducated
listening to Stooges’ first
meditating on apple seeds
thinking how it was all
no fucking fun

Copyright © 2012 by A.J. Kaufmann. All rights reserved.